finally.....

You should be happy for me to know that I am feeling much better today. I am still a tad sore but nothing like I was. And I am no longer walking around like someone shoved something up my butt. LOL.

I am also excited to be back on my desktop computer. It is up and running well now. Finally. Another phone man came out today. Actually it was two of them. I was hopeing that between the two of them they could figure something out with my phone line. Do you even wanna guess what the problem was?

The phone line on the outside of the house that connects into the house was rotted. The man said it was a wonder that I was able to use the phone at all in the house. The first guy that came never even looked at the lines on the outside of the house. I did mention this to the new guys. They were a little surprised to hear this. Have you ever seen two hill-billy, redneck phone repair men. Let me tell you it was fun to watch them work. They had the truck pulled up right next to where they were working and they had the old country station on. Stuff I remember playing when I was a little girl. They were just singing along too. But hey they figured out the problem in no time and have everything working again. I was watching them the whole time. But I couldn't tell you whether they were installing a "bug" or what.

Now that I have shared my good news with everyone I am going to get to doing my exercises for the night.

my son

Today was report card day. My son brought home good grades, of course. He is still on the honor roll. I am a proud parent of an honor roll student. And I don't mind taking the credit. He does the work and I take the credit.

I don't remember having marks on my report cards for behavior. These are marks for areas needing improvement, not grades. I don't even know that they do this in other states. But my son's reports have a section for behavior. This marking period (the 2nd) he has a couple marks, 4 to be exact, that show he needs improvement. He had no marks the 1st marking period. It says he is not turning in his work on time. Not working well independently, not being cooperative all the time or listening to directions.

What else is new. That is him. He has and probably will always be that way. Partially due to his ADHD. And he is also stubborn hard-headed and sometimes a little dense. But he does get it honestly.

He has been doing really good in daycare. He loves it.

He told me tonight that "Jennifer" (his mother) gave him her phone number. If he wants to talk to her he can call. He doesn't want to call right now but he may want to at another time. "But Mom I love you more than I do her" Followed by a big hug, like he was telling me not to worry. Also he says he likes talking to me and he can do it all the time because we live together. He doesn't get to talk to her all the time because he doesn't see her often.

He never ceases to amaze me with his new grown up way of thinking. I can see more and more that he is growing up :o( I don't know if that is a good thing or not, the jury is still out on that one. Some days I can't wait and then other is seems like it is going too fast.

OUCH!!!!!

I had been looking forward to my new aerobics class. This Wednesday was the first class. I go one day a week for 8 weeks. It is dance based aerobics. The instructor is working with "deep muscle" strengthening. Within the first couple of minutes of exercising I was really feeling the burn. I thought I had been working out before this but apparently I wasn't working the right areas, because I am hurting in places I didn't even know I had. After an hour of activity I had to hold onto the wall to walk down the stairs off of the stage we were on. My legs felt like wet noodles. I was completely stretched out, I can tell you that. The first routine does not consist of a lot of jumping around. It is mostly floor exercises. The music is mellow and soft tempo'd. The routine is to change every two weeks.

All in all I had a great time. I got out. I got to laugh at myself and at the others that were there. It is a small class of about a dozen people. My friend that I went with didn't like the music or the floor exercises but I feel that I got a lot out of it. I even got a little sweat out of it. I will continue whether she does or not now that I don't feel so intimidated.

I have continued to do exercises at home because I am in quite a bit of pain and I am trying to keep it up and hopefully stretch out the pain. I even have started taking the stairs instead of the elevator at work.

It hurts to walk up and down the stairs. I hurts to sit down and then to stand back up. It is mainly my legs that are hurting. But today I was sitting in a chair that reclined a little and when I tried to sit back up I was stuck. I looked like I was pregnant with the way I had to get out of that chair, because of the pain from my ab muscles. I had people asking if I needed help, they could pull me out of the chair. Of course the ladies I work with are getting a few laughes out of me. When I first stand up after sitting for a little while I kinda walk funny too. HEHEHE. One lady said I looked like I had wet myself and another said I looked like a little old lady. I am glad I can be some entertainment to them.

I can't wait to continue. And I hope this really works for me. I am also going to see about more classes like this when this one is over. It is inexpensive and worth more than that.

What I really need now is a nice warm bubble bath. Wish I had a tub long/wide/deep enough for soaking. Instead I am going to do tonights exercises and then take a shower.

First visit of the year

My son's worthless bitch of a mother came for a visit today. She hasn't been since Oct 30th. She even decided to come out of the blue today which is not allowed with my husbands custody agreement. But he doesn't like to argue with her. She has to come 3 hours to get here. I wish she still lived in Va Beach, 5 hours away. Anyway, my son is getting older and he realizes who and what she is. He is not blind. She was hanging all on him and he hates that. She had to keep hounding him with "I Love You" before she got his attention enough for him to mumble it back in an annoyed tone. She just has no clue. She is looking more sickly then ever now. Lost a lot of weight. She is still living out of a hotel with her husband. Neither of them work. She has gotten herself far behind in child support again, at least $1000. I know that doesn't seem like a lot but she only has to pay $149 a month. She also owes more than $500 in medical expenses (which is since she started owing child support, she hasn't paid anything yet). She is supposed to pay 30% after the first $250 each year. She thinks that buying him gifts is comparable to paying child support. Did I mention she is also brainless? The other person who is brainless is the old man that keeps letting her take advantage of him. The last time they were here he said she had until the 1st of Nov to decide whether she wanted to be with him or not. Now he is saying she has until the 1st of Feb. Can you say DumbAss? She is only using him for what she can get out of him. She used his money to buy my son some CDs and trading cards. That is another thing she likes to do, try to buy his love. He is smarter than that too. But he has the right idea. If the stupid bitch wants to give him things he really wants then why not take them and ask for as much as he can get out of her. When she firt started coming last year he would ask when is she coming again. Now he doesn't even ask and seems inconvenienced when she is here. Would rather call his friends and play. I don't know if I am supposed to feel bad that I feel the way that I do about her. Or feel bad that he isn't bonding with her the way she wants. I have never spoken anything buy the truth about her to him and that is only when he asks me questions. I can't help if the truth hurts. And I can't help that he isn't blind and can see things for himself when she is around. He knows who she is. He also knows who takes care of him and who his home is with. She needs to stop torturing herself and go away. When he is older and wants to contact her he can go ahead and do it. Even now she gave him a copy of her phone numbers and told him to call her sometimes. I doubt he ever will. But he knows how if her wants too. She should back off and stop pressuring him, it will only backfire. But then again who am I?

I didn't run away

It's me again. I have been having so much trouble with getting online. The phone man came and "fixed" the problem. Yeah. It is only in the one phone line. The phone line in my bedroom where I use the laptop is connected to the phone line downstairs where the desktop is. So I have to sit in the middle of the sitting room on a different phone line to even be able to get on here without battling getting kicked off or things running too slow.

Not too much has been going on around here so there hasn't been much to complain about lately anyway. I have been slacking on writing my daily dairy. But when I have and if I had it was, would be, mainly neutral. My husband hasn't pissed me off in a while now. And the little one has been behaving, for the most part. Normal kid stuff if you know what I mean. I have just been working hard. Today I was lucky enough to be put on call. The chance is slim that they should have to call me in. That saves me money on a babysitter. Though I know the boy really looks forward to having a little spending money. But it is winter and I expect there to be more snow days. So he will make up for it plus some when that happens. My son was a little upset with me this morning cause he looks forward to going over and playing video games and such with this kid. He got over it quick enough though.

I don't know where I got my energy today. I got my call at 5am. I usually don't wake until 6am. My son's alarm went off at 6am and my husband was already out of bed. After that I didn't feel tired to go back to bed. I cooked scrambled eggs and toast for breakfast. And forced him to eat it instead of his usual poptart. It isn't like he doesn't like it, we don't do it very often. Then I went straight to cleaning the dishes, starting the laundry, cleaning the kitchen floor and dusting the house. I have accomplished all of that and have been online for a little bit and it is only 1030am. I have certainly been on a roll. Still have energy. All I have to do it put the clothes away when they finish drying. I have candles out today also. Each room has it's own scent. The sitting room is lemon chiffon, the kitchen is pumpkin pie and the bedroom is honeydew melon. I hope I can hold onto this energy for a while. I start aerobics on Wednesday. I can't wait. I hope that helps motivate me too. I can only hope and hope. I need to just do it for me.

It only took me about a week but I have finished reading my books. The In the Garden Trilogy by Nora Roberts. Blue Dahlia, Black Rose and Red Lily. They were great. I couldn't seem to put them down. I read each one with less time. The last one taking less then 24 hours. I highly recommend them.

just checking in

I don't have my thoughts together enough to write a whole bunch right now. But I did want to stop by and say "HI" while I was online. I haven't been in a while. My phone still isn't fixed. The phone man is supposed to come out today to fix it.

This week has been going good so far. I have read the first book of the In The Garden trilogy by Nora Roberts titled "Blue Dahlia". The book was so good I read it in three days. I read the final 15 chapters out of 21 yesterday on my day off of work. I just couldn't put the book down. Today I will start the second book "Black Rose" The third book is titled "Red Lily" I have just started liking this type of book. I don't know who the author was but I read the Prairie Rose series which I liked. Then I found a book at work on my lunch break by Nora Roberts called Considering Kate. I liked her writing. So when I got a Barnes and Noble gift certificate I used it to buy the trilogy. There is suspense, romance and even a ghost in these books.

As for everything else in my life they are going the way I want them right now. Work had been busy, it is pneumonia season. My medication has me feeling good but I am eating way too much. I am always hungry. This can be my downfall if I don't watch myself. The boys have been behaving, which is always good. My bills are getting paid and I have already saved a little money.

Well I better be getting off of here. The phone man is to be here between 1-5. I need to get some shopping done before then. My friend had surgery yesterday and my God daughter will be having a birthday soon so I have to pick up some cards while I am out. I also have to pick up some "make up" stamps. And some new ones.

I finally got online

After a few days of fighting with AOL I have finally gotten back online. Luckily the problem was not with my computer. AOL said it wasn't their fault either. Can you believe they were actually right. I even called my phone company, I still haven't heard back from them. I found the problem myself. One of my phone cords is messed up and has the whole house messed up with dialing out. So I unplugged that line and here I am, ONLINE!!!! I just have to go to the store today and buy a new cord.

Anyway, it has been almost a week since I have been able to post anything. For the most part this week is going well. Steven has been acting so grown up lately, it is quite amazing. But a part of me keeps doubting him. After the things he has gotten into he has to rebuild that trust from me again I suppose.

My husband does not have my daily journal looking like someone has bleed all over it. That has to be a good thing. I have started standing up for myself which I stated once before. I no longer brush things off or shake my head at them. I have been speaking my mind. If I don't like something that is being said I say it and it has been working. I have found that my husband has not grown up yet. And now that I know this I have to treat him differently, like a little boy. Most women would say they have two children at home and be joking about it. When I say it I am telling the truth. Kinda like smacking their little hands when they touch something they are not supposed to, or giving them the evil Mom eye when they do or say something they shouldn't. When he says something offensive to me I politely say that isn't nice, and he stops. It is almost like I am back in high school with teenage dating problems, immature boys. Why did God make women so much smarter and stronger but put the men on top? If the world was run by women we wouldn't have the problems we have today. Maybe other ones during that time of the month or during menapause but not the problems we have now. But that is another subject so I will let it rest for now. And before I get shot by any of my male friends I will give credit to the few men in the world that did grow up

I don't think I mentioned my friend/neighbor Tami before. She lives down the street from me. Her daughter and my son have known each other since they were 4 years old in pre-school together. She also has a son who is 5 now. Well she lives with her boyfriend (the children's father) in my mother's house. The mother physically and mentally abuses the kids, mostly the little girl. The father mentally abuses the kids and mentally/physically/sexually abuses my friend. Recently the mother had also started physically abusing my friend, which she had already been mentally abusing her. After years of doing nothing but complaining about it she finally had enough and left. We let her and her kids stay with us for two nights until she had all her stuff in order with the courts and DHHR. During the second night and day we had nothing but problems with the whole family coming over and harrassing us. Banging down the door, yelling, cursing, upsetting the kids. During the last day they were here I had to call the cops on this man's sister because she wouldn't leave. She was getting all set up with foodstamps, medical insurance for her and the kids, child support order. She was being given hotel vouchers which she could get for up to 30 days until she could find a job and a place to live. The kids behavior was starting to improve and everything. I forgot to say that all this started on the 20th of Dec. So the kids were not in their home for Christmas. I bought them some things and made sure that they had a little something for Christmas. The church also gave her some toys. The community ministries gave her enough food to last until her food stamps started coming in. Ok back to my story. They were coming along great. It had been a rough start but they were making it. The other day I saw her van driving away from the house. I didn't know if someone else was driving it or if the courts had ordered that she get it back. So we waited to see who was driving it. It was her. All proud of herself she got out of the van and told us how she was back home. After only 10 days she went back. She says the court has ordered that he go to anger management classes. And that he and his mother are being so nice to her. Well the anger management classes will only last so long. The mother is not ordered to go to these classes. And this doesn't help with the alcohol and drugs that are in the house. Or the filthy living conditions. She also said she is ordered to receive child support. Like she is going to get that while she is living there. He had already told her she wasn't going to get anything from him. These people are psycho, and I think she is stupid to even trust them to go back in that house. Or to leave the kids alone with them, which she apparently did because they were not with her when we talked with her. I guess all I can do now is pray for her and the kids. I tried to help and I won't do it again.

Well I am going to get off of here. I have to go meet my mom for lunch today.