Hx #1: my son
When I met him he was a 3 year old, cute and shy little boy. As I got to know him I found him to be withdrawn, barely disciplined and yet sweet. I felt sorry for him. As I mentioned in the last posting his mother wasn't there for him and he would wake up crying in the middle of the night. This is where it seemed the withdrawn mood came from.
The lack of discipline came from three different reasons. To start his mother let him get away with anything as long as he wasn't getting in her way. Second dad gave him everything he wanted and more. He had no respect for his things because he could break a toy just to break it and daddy would go out and buy him another. Dad's reasonings were that he was an only child and he could do extra for him and he felt guilty for the boys mother not being around. I am an only child and I never treated my things in that way or got everything that I wanted. I argued that position over and over until it started to sink in. Also the toys were starting to get more expensive and it was really starting to be a habit. Lastly was grandma. Since mom wasn't around grandma was the main female role in the boys life. She did everything for him, never letting him do for himself. He never had to clean up his messes, she even fed him at the dining table. She spoiled him like any grandma would do but it really wasn't what was best for him being that she was temporarily filling the mother position.
He was potty trained a couple months prior to turning 4. It only took a few days to complete because he was way ready for it just never had anyone address the issue completely besides sticking him in a pull up diaper. And of course grandma had no problem with cleaning his butt. Dad finished the potty training.
As for the sweetness, he found it easy to curl up next to you and sit and watch TV for hours. He tried to be helpful at times too, although he wouldn't do for himself. He wasn't too independent.
Now that dad was on the right page on what to do the child was starting to come around.
Next would come some important changes in his life and new obstacles for us to face together.
The lack of discipline came from three different reasons. To start his mother let him get away with anything as long as he wasn't getting in her way. Second dad gave him everything he wanted and more. He had no respect for his things because he could break a toy just to break it and daddy would go out and buy him another. Dad's reasonings were that he was an only child and he could do extra for him and he felt guilty for the boys mother not being around. I am an only child and I never treated my things in that way or got everything that I wanted. I argued that position over and over until it started to sink in. Also the toys were starting to get more expensive and it was really starting to be a habit. Lastly was grandma. Since mom wasn't around grandma was the main female role in the boys life. She did everything for him, never letting him do for himself. He never had to clean up his messes, she even fed him at the dining table. She spoiled him like any grandma would do but it really wasn't what was best for him being that she was temporarily filling the mother position.
He was potty trained a couple months prior to turning 4. It only took a few days to complete because he was way ready for it just never had anyone address the issue completely besides sticking him in a pull up diaper. And of course grandma had no problem with cleaning his butt. Dad finished the potty training.
As for the sweetness, he found it easy to curl up next to you and sit and watch TV for hours. He tried to be helpful at times too, although he wouldn't do for himself. He wasn't too independent.
Now that dad was on the right page on what to do the child was starting to come around.
Next would come some important changes in his life and new obstacles for us to face together.
posted by almst crzy at 1:29 PM
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